A notice to all Citizens!


Otis: Oh, what’s wrong? Richard Diamond: Well, it’s pretty obvious.
You’ve been sleeping in the wrong position. Otis: What are you talking about? Richard Diamond: Oh, Otis, stop trying to
be a sport. Get rid of the bats in your house. They’re used to hanging upside down. Otis: Oh, for Pete’s — Announcer: We interrupt this broadcast to
bring you the following special announcement! Notice is hereby given that all citizens must,
everywhere, every day, constantly fiddle with their cell phones. At no time is it permissible
to sit idle and observe the poetry of life or look into the eyes of another person. Aberration
will not be tolerated. The arrival of a snippet of trivial text holds the promise of unimagined
pleasure. Drivers, this means you! Remember always: Practice constant devotion to the
precious object. Give full attention to the glorious technology. Maintain unselfish love
for the flimsy hardware. That is all. Richard Diamond: Wells could never go to the
police. Yeah, and another thing. The pick-up was pretty carefully…

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