Civil Protection: Friday

Civil Protection: Friday


[Subtitles by danielsangeo] MIKE: Do you know who keeps
stealing food from the break room? DAVE: Boonzaaah! MIKE: I’m asking because I’ve had my
lunch stolen for the third time now. It wasn’t even that special this
time, just a grilled cheese sandwich. DAVE: I am mighty tiger! MIKE: What? Well, the reason I’m still
pissed about this, is that the last time they ate my
entire bag of chocolate chip cookies. Those tasted good. You know, those Pepperidge Farm ones? DAVE: I am NINJA! MIKE: Ha. Yeah, funny. DAVE: I just can’t get
my mind around this. I mean, who the hell steals food
from the people they work with? Like a raccoon. DAVE: Whooping crane! Whoop. Whoop. Whoop. [Dave whooping]
MIKE: Y’know, considering the times when it’s happened, I think it might’ve been one of
those punks from D-Sector. DAVE: …whoop. Whoop. Whoop. MIKE: What are you doing? DAVE: Whoop. I am a ninja! MIKE: And I’m a ballerina. C’mon, knock it off. You’ve been watching too much
cartoons or… something. DAVE: Do not MOCK… a ninja! Whee-yaaa, yah! MIKE: Look, I know this job gets boring, and I’m sure acting like a ninja DAVE: Ninja!
MIKE: is more fun than standing here counting the pigeons, but you
know as well as I do that Internal Affairs has been doing
surprise checks lately. DAVE: Whachashaw! MIKE: The last thing we need is
them writing up your karate moves– DAVE: Ninja moves! MIKE: C’mon, grow up. Just cut it out so we don’t get
into trouble, okay. DAVE: [strange noises] MIKE: What the hell is wrong with you? DAVE: Weeoww-shawww… wah! MIKE: There must be half a dozen
cameras around here! DAVE: Waaahh! MIKE: You’re going to get us
another citation! DAVE: Waaahh. [strange noises] MIKE: C’mon, Dave, leave these people
alone. They’re just on their way to work. DAVE: [strange noises] MIKE: Jesus, do we have to go
through this every Friday? Where you act like a retard and
I have to finish my shift with you? DAVE: [strange noises] MIKE: I don’t believe this.
This is so unprofessional. DAVE: [strange noises] MIKE: Dave! DAVE: [strange noises] MIKE: DAVE! STOP IT! DAVE: Whoa-yah. MIKE: What the hell are you
trying to do to us? We can’t get in trouble again. We’ve already got a previous suspen– DAVE: WHAAAOOH! MIKE: Alright, that’s it. DAVE: [groans] MIKE: That’s right. That metal helmet of yours conducts
electricity pretty good, doesn’t it? DAVE: [groans] MIKE: You’re an idiot, Dave. Uh oh. Uhh… Nothing to see here, folks. DAVE: [groans] MIKE: Move along. DAVE: [groans]

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    Roland Sloth

    I am not sure how to feel knowing I saw this the day it was uploaded… and now watching it again 11 years later… besides old.

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    BM XT

    Please tell how did you animate this? It looks not like stock animations and not like your typical GMod jerky ragdoll-ish animation.

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    JiminyJustin

    I first saw this video when I was in fifth grade, just as I was getting into valve stuff. I can't tell you how many weekend mornings I spent in bed, binging the entire series on my ipad. This was a stroke of pure genius Ross, and I can't thank you enough for all of the beautiful memories I associate with your content.

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    Franquito410

    why 11 years later I have to find this masterpiece? damn, it feels like when your friends are in a party but you can't go because of work and after that you arrive to the place just to found all the chaos, mess and everyone drunk on the ground

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    BlackPantsLegion

    Watching this in school, 10 years ago, my world changed.

    As a security guard, I knew more than I needed to ever know.

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    buba ruba

    Clearly Dave stole his food. A whole set of chocolate chip cookies can give a man such a sugar rush he thinks hes a ninja.

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    MrSHURIKENCHO

    Aaaah the friken memories… I remember watching this and thinking it was cool… and then 1:55 came and i died laughing… 12 years later and it still made me fucking LOL

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    ItsChev notJeff

    These two represent two aspects of my mind
    Dave: the Imaginative side with child-like impulses
    Mike: the conscience who tells the imaginative side to stop being a retard

    edit: actually, Dave kinda is a retard on this one

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    tomdadada

    Comes pretty close to the "Paranoia"-RPG from the early 90´s, certain Terry-Gilliam-Movies & Monty Python to add some flavor. Thats a good mix.

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    Maria Rogers

    It makes me feel old that I remember watching this when it originally came out, give a thumbs up if you remember it too.

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    CanadianLoony

    Ross was working as a correctional officer as of making this video.

    Right? I didnt know Ross had short hair either!

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    T.P.A The Peoples Army

    Lol I swear this exchange is the greatest thing ever
    Mike: Come on grow up..Just cut it out so we dont get in trouble ok?

    Dave: starts flapping arms wildly and screaming WEEELOOOWALALLALAHOWAAAAAYOYOWAAAAAAAA

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