When we come back to Guate from
Fairfield County for the first time, my grandmother: ¿Que tal mijita? ¿Que tal estas?
¡Que grande estas, mi reina! ¿Te hizo mucha falta Guatemala, si? ¡Si! I want to say Yes, I have
grown, and yes, I missed Guatemala. But I can’t get the words out. And when I
finally get the words, they come out hal-ting-ly. My godmother tells my grandmother:
No es tan inteligente como su hermano. (audience laughter) I am so as smart as my brother! But the words won’t come. I understand everything everyone says to me.
If I can’t talk to my family — They’re already treating me different.
What if they stop talking to me cuz they think I can’t understand?
Feels like I’m falling into a big hole and I’m gonna be left behind. Lost.