Society And Pickup Lines Are Devolving | Truth & Iliza | Freeform


TONIGHT WE’RE ASKING IS SOCIETY DEVOLING.
WE ARE IN AN ERA IN HUMAN HISTORY CAN COMMUNICATE WITH ANYONE ALL THE TIME. A GUY YOU WENT OUT WITH ONCE IN 2014 CAN POST HAPPY BIRTHDAY ON YOUR FACEBOOK. YOUR MOM CAN LEAVE YOU FIVE LONG VOICE MAILS OF BUTT DIALS. AND A TEENAGE BOY IN TURKEY CAN APPARENTLY TWEET ME THAT HE HAS NOTES ON MY COMEDY SPECIAL. THEN I’D BE, LIKE, WHICH ONE? I HAVE THREE. I THINK WE’RE DEVOLVING BECAUSE WE’RE SAYING MORE WHILE ACTUALLY SAYING LESS. WE POST PICTURES ON INSTAGRAM WITH TINY CAPTIONS AND EVEN THAT’S TOO MUCH READING SO SOME OF US JUST SEND SNAPCHATS. AND YET — SO SAD. AND YET, TO SEE A ROW OF PARENTS IN THE BACK, LIKE, YEAH, RIDICULOUS. AND YET NO ONE FEELS HEARD OR UNDERSTOOD. WE’RE HAVING A COMMUNICATION BREAKDOWN.
AT NO PLACE IS THIS MORE EVIDENT THAN IN THE WAY MEN HIT ON WOMEN.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>HERE WE HAVE THE EVOLUTION OF MAN.
WE’VE ALL SEEN THIS. THE CONDENSED VERSION IS THAT MAN STARTS OFF BASICALLY AS AN APE ON THE SAVANNAH AND BASICALLY LEARNS TO TIE HIS SHOES.
HERE WE HAVE THE EVOLUTION OF THE PICK UP LINE. IT WAS A REQUIREMENT FOR MEN TO MAKE AN EFFORT IF THEY WANTED A WIFE.
ORIGINALLY THIS WAS DONE BY OFFERING THE WOMAN’S FAMILY, SAY, A GOAT. THEN LIKE A THOUSAND YEARS LATER MEN STARTED COURTING WOMEN AND BEGAN WRITING LOVE LETTERS. THEN SEVERAL HUNDRED YEARS LATER IT WAS IN PERSON AT BARS WHICH REQUIRED MEN TO HAVE SOME SEMBLANCE OF A PERSONALITY, VERBAL ABILITY, HYGIENE AND OF COURSE MONEY. THOSE DRINKS DON’T BUY THEMSELVES. FAST FORWARD TO RECENTLY WHEN WE GOT TEXTS. YES.
VERY ROMANTIC. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>SUCK ON THAT, NAPOLEON. THAT PROVED TO BE — THEN WE PROVED TO THE WRITTEN WORD. DICK PICTURES. WHY IS THAT SO BIG? THAT’S — WHO’S, LIKE, ZOOMING IN? BUT EVEN THAT WAS TOO MANY SYLLABLES SO NOW WE JUST CALL THEM DICK PICS. THE LAST PICK FROM THAT GUY IN TURKEY. STOP SENDING THESE TO MEN AND JUST RATE MY SPECIAL FIVE STARS AND BRING OUT MY DESK.>>>I NEVER STRESS THAT CHAIR IS GOING TO BE THERE. THAT SONG WAS WRITTEN BY LUKE FROM NASHVILLE. INDUSTRIAL BOW HOUSE ANGER TE TECHNO.
BRING UP DETAILS ON INSTAGRAM. SCROLL THROUGH IT BECAUSE I GOT ENG ENGAGED THIS WEEKEND. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>WE MADE IT! TONIGHT WE’RE ASKING IS SOCIETY DEVOLING. TO HELP VERY THAT SKEIS SENIOR EDITOR OF STAR MAGAZINE SHALLON LESTER.
BUT I’M WANT GOING TO START THE SHOW WITHOUT INTRODUCING TIMOTHY SIMONS FROM “VEEP” IS HERE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]>>TIMOTHY, YOU’RE KNOWN FOR PLAYING THE RESPECTED AND NOT AT ALL SUBTLE JABS AT OUR GOVERNMENT AND CONGRESSMAN JONAH RYAN.
MY QUESTION TO YOU IS DO YOU THINK SOCIETY IS DEVOLVING?>>WHO CARES? IT’S FINE.>>I FEEL LIKE I’M YOUR MOM. HOW WAS YOUR SCHOOL TODAY?>>COME ON. I DON’T WANT TO READ BOOKS. I WANT TO DRINK SODA AND DO THIS.
>>SODA? THE FUN THING ABOUT THOSE FIDGET SPINNERS IS THAT WHEN YOU’RE DONE PLAYING WITH IT IS IT’S GOING TO GO INTO A LANDFILL AND

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