TARANIS THE REAL GOD OF THUNDER – SOCIETY OF VIRTUE


It’s too late, mighty Taranis king of
thunder of Galilee In a few minutes, all Megalopolisville will be destroyed to become my new evil kingdom! Quick, Taranis, the tower! It’s a catalyst for his power! You have to destroy it now or more than dozens of people will die with just the energy wave that the tower will emanate! Great, but… with thunder? Yes, with thunder, Taranis! Sure, sure of course! But, when you mean dozens, how many is that exactly? Are you fucking kidding me? No, I’m just doing some math to understand the cost benefit of the whole Thunder thing But okay, let’s do it! Let’s go!! Cost benefit what? What’s happening!? Hello, Stuart? Hey! yeah, so we’ll need about five or six… If you have a virgin there might be good
too… now! yeah, now it’s good Sorry uh…Taranis, what are you doing? Uh… the Thunder thing.. No, you’re talking on your phone… instead of doing the Thunder thing that
I told you to do But that’s it, theThunder thing! Human sacrifice, the whole thing… Human sacrifice? Whoa whoa, wait! What are you talking about? Wait , wait… you’re really going to do that? Really? You’re supposed to be the smartest, most cultured guy on earth you You could build a nuclear power plant with a box of matches and glue and string, but you don’t know where my powers come from? What? I…whoa! I thought this human sacrifice thing was a myth! Of course it’s a myth! But so is as a half naked Thunder guard and here we are! Do you or don’t you want the whole Thunder thing? Can’t you do the Thunder thing without sacrificing anybody? NO! You think I don’t prefer that also? But
unfortunately that’s the way it goes but look we’re still good, sacrificing six
people, or so, to save a few dozen is still good, right? That’s not how we do things, Taranis! We can’t just get people killed! The goal is to save people here! You mean we can’t get any more people killed, right? That’s what you mean.. Oh shit… tell me you didn’t… I thought you knew! Sacrifice is implicit in this kind of thing Being a Welsh God and all… What did you guys think that I asked for tithing from my buddies? I can’t believe we can’t find a fucking God that doesn’t have to kill a lot of people to use his powers Alright folks, this is Dionysus, a cousin of mine if you throw a good party with a considerable orgy of, at least, fifteen to sixteen people to honor him, you can use his powers without any human sacrifice Yeah, what’s his superpower? Wine Then thou can get six, nay seven, of my most precious libations If thous can acquire me a fiery headed bear man… in a hot tub

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