As walnut date loaves go,
that wasn’t bad. Whoa, what have we here?
Retro tech, huh? Thrift store? Salvation Army? – Uh, the garbage, actually.
– You’re a dumpster diver? Yeah, I was… Anyway, look, um, I definitely did not apply
for your grant… – Ah-ah! Me first.
– Okay. Quick question of the rhetorical variety. That’s you, right? Um, no. – What do you mean?
– Yeah. Look at you go. Wow! Nice catch.
3,000 pounds, 40 miles an hour. That’s not easy. You got mad skills. That’s all on YouTube, though, right? That’s where you found that? Because you know that’s all fake. It’s all done on the computer. Mmm-hmm. It’s like that video. What is it? Yeah. Oh, you mean like
those UFOs over Phoenix? Exactly. Oh, what have we here? Uh… You’re the Spider-ling. Crime-fighting spider.
You’re Spider-Boy? Spider-Man. Not in that onesie, you’re not. It’s not a onesie. I don’t believe this.
I was actually having a really good day today, Mr. Stark. Didn’t miss my train, this perfectly good
DVD player was just sitting there… and Algebra test, nailed it. Who else knows? Anybody? Nobody. Not even your unusually attractive aunt? No. No. No! If she knew, she would freak out. And when she freaks out, I freak out. You know what I think
is really cool? This webbing. That tensile strength is off the charts. Who manufactured that? I did. Climbing walls, how you doing that? Adhesive gloves? It’s a long story. I was… Lordy! Can you even see in these? Yes, I can. I’m blind! I can see in those. Okay? It’s just that when whatever
happened, happened… it’s like my senses
have been dialled to 11. There’s way too much input,
so they just kinda help me focus. You’re in dire need of an upgrade. Systemic, top to bottom,
hundred-point restoration. That’s why I’m here. Why you doing this? I gotta know, what’s your MO? What gets you outta that
twin bed in the morning? Because… Because I’ve been me my whole life, and I’ve had these powers
for six months. Mmm-hmm. I read books, I build computers. Yeah, I would love to play football, but I couldn’t then, so I shouldn’t now. Sure, because you’re different. Exactly. But I can’t tell
anybody that, so I’m not. When you can do the things
that I can, but you don’t… and then the bad things happen… they happen because of you. So you wanna look out for the little guy,
you wanna do your part? Make the world
a better place, all that, right? Yeah, just looking out for the little guy. That’s what it is. I’m gonna sit here, so you move the leg. You got a passport? No, I don’t even have a driver’s license. – You ever been to Germany?
– No. Oh, you’ll love it. – I can’t go to Germany.
– Why? I got homework. I’m gonna pretend you didn’t say that. No, I’m being serious.
I can’t just drop out of school. Might be a little dangerous. Better tell Aunt Hottie
I’m taking you on a field trip. Don’t tell Aunt May. All right, Spider-Man. Get me out of this. Sorry. I’ll get the…